Being dominated

[titeabs]

Is that a trend to becoming more and more submissive? Can that be seen as a pattern for being a future 'bottom'?
Curious what your thoughts are. I am married, but do have an attraction for both sexes. I do find myself fantasizing about men more often, probably due to the 'thrill' of working outside the box.(no pun intended)
My wife and I have reversed roles, with her being dominant and using the strapon.......WHICH WAS INCREDIBLE. I have only been active with a man twice in my life, the last time....oh , about five years ago. But I do notice that my appetite for being dominated is a huge turnon. My appetite for a man has increased......I never anticipated being a bottom, but I get aroused now just thinking of an attractive man banging me!! My wife has noticed how much easier it is to get me off by anal play, being on top, sitting on my face,etc.........
Any thoughts? And if your a good looking male, or an attractive dominatrix, and you plan on being in the Detroit area, send me a PM. ;)

[OralBradley]

Would that my wife were as willing to be sexually aggressive with me. I'd love for her to fuck my ass, tie me up and sit on my face, etc. But we both tend to be submissives.

[Woody]

I admit to a preference of being in control and calling the shots and it is usually me who first introduces something new into sex play.It is a definite turn on for me though when the person you are with has that look of control in their eyes.My wife comes out of her petite shell and gets great pleasure just from my intense reaction to any sort of anal penetration.We have not tried a strap on, our favouite toy for both of us is an 8" cyberskin and it is definitely used more in me than her.
To generalise I think guys today are happier to be more submissive and experiment more during sex,lots of guys just don't admit to it though and some never act on their fantasies.

[bigregory]

I don't like the terms Top or Bottoms,It"s like asking me if i'm gay or st8.
Im Bi.
I guess thats why i think a double ended dildo is so much fun.
Hey its all good..

[woolleygirl]

I guess for me that I am a bit of both but I love being dominated. :tong:


When the tables are turned lets just standup and dance :tongue:

T

[Sparks]

Dominated. An interesting word that can be looked at in many fashions. I don't care for dominating women, or men in any fashion. That's just me. Intamate relations with men or women (regardless of you gender), is a sharing experience. Just my :2cents:

[OralBradley]

"I don't care for dominating women, or men in any fashion."

In my note below I didn't make the differenciation between "aggressive" and dominating." I like a sexual partner to be sexually aggressive with me, but don't care to dominate or be indominated either en bed or out. I tend to resist any efforts I perceive to dominate me or to become totally submissive to me. A partner laying back and enjoying my minstrations is entirely something else.

[foamy]

I LOVE to be dominated...

If you're a dominating girl, please contact me! :bipride:

[Tynary]

My sexual behaviour is similar to my sexuality by that I mean varied. Sometimes I like the idea of being dominated and other times I like the idea of dominating somone. At first in a relationship I'm probably more submisive but if I become more comfortable than I become dominant as well.

[trip1]

Maybe Dominated is the wrong word. Maybe it's more like aggressive. What I find refreshing as hell is for a woman to be aggressive once in a while. Maybe it's the same as Dominating but I do think there is a difference.....

[Herbwoman39]

There was a brief period in our marriage when hubby and I played with dominant and submissive roles. The truth is that when I was the Dom, I just got tired of it because *I* had to do all the planning and all the stimulating and it just wore me out because I wasn't getting nearly as much in return.

It was nice being the sub *sometimes* but being a two-time rape survivor, I will still on rare occasion have flashbacks.

That is a very BAD thing when you're all tied up. And nothing puts a faster end to good sex than panicked screaming and crying :(

Now we both prefer mutual pleasuring. It's SO much better for us to have a good give-and-take.

[skiflydive]

Is aggressive the right word? I prefer assertive

[bibottom30064]

For me domination is the correct word. My work world has me in "charge" all the time. It is nice to be in a position where I just bend over and relax or use my mouth to breing another pleasure.

[mike9753]

I do enjoy it when my wife has taken on the more assertive role. Most of the time, I am the assertive one who iniates the action. When we were dating, years ago, we had a strap-on that we used occasionally and I thought we both enjoyed. We also played around with a little bondage - lite bondage - not serious - lots of laughter and playfulness - but I was tied up, teased and not in control. We had a butt plug which she seemed to take great delight in getting in my ass. But then we got married, and alas you can guess what stopped happening then.

So I know that I like being the one who is not in control. I do not think I would enjoy any pain (aside from a little spanking now and then), torture or serious humiliation. I think for me it's just the control issue.

Once, before I was married, I had phone sex with a guy. He was a serious bottom. He wanted me to really dominate him. I remember that I really got into it over the phone. Again, it was not a "painful" experience for him - just me dictating when he counld touch himself, what he would do to me if I was there, etc. I got really turned on. But I think it was that we had complimentary fantasies. If he would have wanted me to pee on him, I probably would have lost my erection and hung up on him. That does not do anything for me, except disgust me. But his needs were compatible with mine. Perhaps I got excited thinking of myself in his place.

I guess if I had to try to apply these experiences, I would guess that most of us could get into some sort of play where we were in more control than our partner or less, if we were confident/safe with our partner and they with us.

The extremes of BDSM are probably outside of the comfort zone of most of us, unless we have had some sort of pre-conditioning in our past which has linked sexual arousal to the extreme behavior of BDSM.

Just my rambling thoughts to stimulate debate.

Mike