Is it possible to love two people on the same level?

[VCS1345]

I am new here and I have only posted one other time. Just to give you a little background on my situation. I have known that I was bi since I was in my late teens (almost 40 now). I have recently came out to my wife and a few select friends. Here is where it gets interesting. My wife and I met and became real close friends with a gay male who is close to our age about 6 months ago. He is an extremely talented singer (and VERY cute!!). I developed a secret crush on him. To make a long story short, when I outed myself about a month ago, he and I shared several intimate moments together. That secret crush has now developed into something very special to me. He and I have decided curb the sexual affairs as it is not fair to my wife. I am not a person that is into threesomes, none of us are. Yes, my wife is fully aware of what has been going on. Again, I ask.....is it possible to love 2 different people on the same level? I really do love my wife but I can't handle losing those special times that he and I share. Any advice, comments or questions will be greatly appreciated.

[reddc513]

I am new here and I have only posted one other time. Just to give you a little background on my situation. I have known that I was bi since I was in my late teens (almost 40 now). I have recently came out to my wife and a few select friends. Here is where it gets interesting. My wife and I met and became real close friends with a gay male who is close to our age about 6 months ago. He is an extremely talented singer (and VERY cute!!). I developed a secret crush on him. To make a long story short, when I outed myself about a month ago, he and I shared several intimate moments together. That secret crush has now developed into something very special to me. He and I have decided curb the sexual affairs as it is not fair to my wife. I am not a person that is into threesomes, none of us are. Yes, my wife is fully aware of what has been going on. Again, I ask.....is it possible to love 2 different people on the same level? I really do love my wife but I can't handle losing those special times that he and I share. Any advice, comments or questions will be greatly appreciated.

Hunny it is very possible. My husband and I are looking to meet someone willing to be in a poly relationship where we are all involved with each other. It happens all the time that people love 2+ at a time. Personally I think Loving a woman ia a lil dif than loving a man. But they each have their own Special to them. Good luck.

[Realist]

VSC, I can say, unequivocally, yes....you can love two (or more) equally.

On two occasions I have been in long-term relationships, with more than one person, who I loved the same. One lasted for about 13 months and one lasted for over 2 years. Transfers and career changes made it impossible for us to remain together.

If circumstances had been different, I could have happily lived with them for the rest of my life.

[darkeyes]

Yes... but it's not always easy and it isn't always wise but it is when it happens, always unavoidable...:)

[Gearbox]

You can't help loving, and there's no reason to quash or deny it IMO. Be a lover.:)
How does your wife & 'other bloke' feel about each other?

[innaminka]

Yes, of course.

However don't let lust be disguied as love, as many of us do.

[keefer10.7]

To me, NO. If my family was caught in a fire, I would save my children first. As a father, my children will always be a peg to how I view love. If my wife were in that same fire, I know she would understand who I saved first. Love is not just sexual...it is an emotion that no one can divide.

[NakedInSeattle]

Simple answer...yes.

[VCS1345]

You can't help loving, and there's no reason to quash or deny it IMO. Be a lover.:)
How does your wife & 'other bloke' feel about each other?

@Gearbox......they are actually best friends. She loves him as much as I do. Only difference is that, with me, it's the same love but I also get the sexual part of the relationship.....if that makes any sense.

[VCS1345]

Thank you all for taking the time to respond. I appreciate the input. Mad, mad love to you all!!

[dseven]

Hell yeah! Of course you can love two people at the same level, if there is something I would really like to be involved in is in a poly relationship, I know I would be able to love two people at the same time and enjoy seeing them together too, it's the most beautiful and pure form of love. :) :bibounce:

[Gearbox]

@Gearbox......they are actually best friends. She loves him as much as I do. Only difference is that, with me, it's the same love but I also get the sexual part of the relationship.....if that makes any sense.
Well sense or not, I'd love some of that too.:)

[*pan*]

yes it is, example can you love two of your childern the same, love is love not sex.

[Michigan_cpl]

to answer your question, yes is it possible to love two people at the same time, as long as all are agreeable one it. that is what my wife and i are are looking for and wanting. we wish you the best of luck. there is northing hotter the a mmf 3 some,:flag2:

[csreef]

You should do some research into PolyAmory...

[IanBorthwick]

One of the hardest things I have found is to be Polyamorous in a brainwashed world. People are taught to hate and distrust us, so being Bi/Poly is insult to injury socially. But yes, you can love any number, deeply, unreservedly, and I encourage it if you can do so without rancor being drawn down on you.