What the HELL am I DOING??

[Herbwoman39]

It's time for everyone's favorite freak-out game "What the hell am I doing?"

I was looking at profiles tonight and flirting with the idea of contacting a couple of women when I realized something. I am nowhere NEAR ready to have sex with another woman! The last time I contacted someone she got scared and told me she wasn't ready to pursue anything more than a friendship. Quite honestly I was relieved.

At the same time two nights ago I practically wet myself over Jessica Simpson in "Dukes of Hazzard".

What the HELL is going on with me?!? I really don't get it. Does anyone else ever feel like this?

[LoveLion]

All the time. Sometimes I get in a mood when I tell myself I would just love throw myself into an orgy or somthing (usually when I am extremely aroused), But then when I calm down I realise that I really couldnt if the situation arouse. Ita all the about the difference between Fantasy and Reality.

[citystyleguy]

obviously, the desire is there! for some the thrill is in the unknown, and you have some of that, but in your heart of hearts, there is the fear of making that step.

so step back, take a breather and ask if you really want sex with a woman; if you really are set on such a desire and need, then take smaller steps. you may have the need to blow your nose when it runs, but that doesn't mean you have to have a nose job?! :rolleyes: sorry, for the wierd analogy, but the point is to take it one step at a time.

be up front if the timing is right, let you and the one you deisre the time to know what is in your hearts; maybe not the blast of the jumping into the water, but you will be happier and more at ease to enjoy what you ulitmately desire.

good luck!

[ambi53mm]

It's time for everyone's favorite freak-out game "What the hell am I doing?"

I was looking at profiles tonight and flirting with the idea of contacting a couple of women when I realized something. I am nowhere NEAR ready to have sex with another woman! The last time I contacted someone she got scared and told me she wasn't ready to pursue anything more than a friendship. Quite honestly I was relieved.

At the same time two nights ago I practically wet myself over Jessica Simpson in "Dukes of Hazzard".

What the HELL is going on with me?!? I really don't get it. Does anyone else ever feel like this?

The apprehension is normal and reflects the value you place on your actions. Fantasy offers safe haven and allows us to contemplate the possibilities. Taking action requires a certain amount of abandonment, courage, and a willingness to forgo what may be considered safe haven in exchange for the “experience”.
I dated a girl that would always preface everything that she hoped to accomplish in her life with “One day I’m going to.. “. It was as if her life was always on hold waiting to begin at some future point. “YOU ARE READY NOW”. Perhaps you’re just waiting for the right person to help guide you down that path. Someone that will help you overcome those fears and apprehensions that hold you back and replace them with feelings of comfort and confidence. Fantasy always allows us to be in control, even if the role we play is submissive. The reality is that some control will have to be relinquished because the complexity of another spirit with it’s own agenda is involved. The key element here will involve an intuitive trust of knowing that the time, and opportunity have arrived, and the ability to let those fears and apprehensions take a back seat to your desire for personal growth.

Ambi :)

[someotherguy]

Being confused should be enjoyed, not anguished. Look into having a revolving door installed for your closet. Then instead of a treadmill you could get your exercise going around in circles as you choose what not to wear that day and who not to not wear it with.

[allbimyself]

Jessica Simpson? ewwwwwwwwwwww

I think you have other issues that need addressing before your stated concern!

:P

[Lorcan]

How do we meet our real relationships? I met one of my loves searching for the same college class. We hung out together for about one semester before things got sexual. I met my current love online and we talked for about 6 months online before we even met... then hung out for several more months before things got sexual.

maybe i'm a sexual prude (although i have instances that would prove otherwise) but contacting a person online with the main focus being sex would freak me out too.

That's just my temperment. I not saying that everyone else should be the same. I'm just saying that if you temperment is like mine, that's why it would freak you out.

[LoveLion]

How do we meet our real relationships? I met one of my loves searching for the same college class. We hung out together for about one semester before things got sexual. I met my current love online and we talked for about 6 months online before we even met... then hung out for several more months before things got sexual.

maybe i'm a sexual prude (although i have instances that would prove otherwise) but contacting a person online with the main focus being sex would freak me out too.

That's just my temperment. I not saying that everyone else should be the same. I'm just saying that if you temperment is like mine, that's why it would freak you out.

Im am exactly the same way as you Locran. I wouldn't say we are prudes. For me at least, sex is something that I would want to save for someone special. Random sex, meeting someone for sex, or sex on a first date, would scare me and it would seem awkward and weird. For me to have sex with someone I would need to really know them and feel very strongly for them.

[Herbwoman39]

Yeah I know...Jessica Simpson normally is a big ick factor but did you SEE her in that movie?? (drools on shoes)

I used to have no problems with one night stands. I think that a huge part of the issue is fidelity. Although hubby is being supportive, I don't want to hurt him. Regardless of what he says, I think he would be hurt if I slept with another woman.

He bends over backwards to make me happy and will even tribate with me when I'm in the mood for a woman. (It helps that he enjoys it almost as much as i do :D ) Maybe I'm pressuring myself too much to "lose my bi virginity". There is just SO much at stake and so many things to consider.

BTW, Citystyleguy, I like the analogy.

[tommyswing]

If you don't feel comfortable you just may not be ready. It took me many years to go from fantasy to reality, being turned on by a guys buldge didn't mean I was ready to do him. When I did it was very natural and happended when I least expected it. Sound like your thinking if it excites me so much, why don't I go the next step. I think it's really important to take time and find the right person and not pressure yourself.

[thelos]

It's time for everyone's favorite freak-out game "What the hell am I doing?"

I was looking at profiles tonight and flirting with the idea of contacting a couple of women when I realized something. I am nowhere NEAR ready to have sex with another woman! The last time I contacted someone she got scared and told me she wasn't ready to pursue anything more than a friendship. Quite honestly I was relieved.

At the same time two nights ago I practically wet myself over Jessica Simpson in "Dukes of Hazzard".

What the HELL is going on with me?!? I really don't get it. Does anyone else ever feel like this?

It's really all about "Just Do It" if not you will wonder all your life. I get in and out of moods myself. The first time I decided to try it I went to a gay gym here in town. I was scared and anxious but I pushed ahead and went in, stripped down and went into the unknown. I had a great time. Had a cock in my mouth for the first time, jacked off someone else and watched. It was great. Now when I get the urge I go down there and do the same, satisfy my need and curiosity.

You are not alone, we are all a little scared at first but don't come to the end of your life and wish you had. Go for it.

[Herbwoman39]

It's really all about "Just Do It" if not you will wonder all your life. I get in and out of moods myself. The first time I decided to try it I went to a gay gym here in town. I was scared and anxious but I pushed ahead and went in, stripped down and went into the unknown. I had a great time. Had a cock in my mouth for the first time, jacked off someone else and watched. It was great. Now when I get the urge I go down there and do the same, satisfy my need and curiosity.

You are not alone, we are all a little scared at first but don't come to the end of your life and wish you had. Go for it.

Isn't it just easier for men though? There really aren't gyms or j/o clubs for women that I've seen. You can just go find a club or steam room and find guys who want to play. As a woman i have no idea where to go if i were to look for something like that.

[Avocado]

I've never met anyone from the net, male or female. I'd say the main thing is agree to meet up with someone just as mates. If nothing happens, then you haven't wasted your trip.

[yoyo4u]

Isn't it just easier for men though? There really aren't gyms or j/o clubs for women that I've seen. You can just go find a club or steam room and find guys who want to play. As a woman i have no idea where to go if i were to look for something like that.

On the contrary, I suspect, women have it easier!
Just consider this scenario!

I'd knock on the door of my neighbor and offer the chance for a threesome...

Can you picture the expression on the guy's face and my bloody eye?

Now you knock on your neighbor's door and you'll see the difference!

Nighbors are a lot better choice, because you already know and like them. After the initial encounter you'll have an open invitation from her!

Now I can picture this! :bigrin:

I'm glad if I could help!
yoyo

PS. With today's gas prices, if nothing else, think of all the money you save, by not having to travel!!!
:tongue:

[ukmale32]

I like the idea of doing more things with another guy. I've not really met once I fancy. I slept naked with the guy who I've sucked many times before - but nothing happened. And I don't want anything with him. I would try more in a mfm I think. I'd like to find some nice bi/gay porn - people that look normal & get off on some of that. A lot of gay porn I've looked at - and i've not looked at loads - all seems very shit. I love sex with a woman. Not sure if I'll ever meet the man I want to do it all with - and i like the idea of trying it all at least once.