Close friends of which sex?

[mannysg]

I got to thinking today. (well actually the thread "Calling all bisexuals! I need your help!!" by bigirl_inwv made me think about this.)

My entire life, I've found it easier to be close friends with females. I'm not talking about someone to be a lover, I'm talking about someone to just hang out with, do things together, someone who I can confide in, talk freely with. The only physical contact with them is hugs, and an occasionaly kiss on the cheek. There have been a few who were also sexually attractive, but we never did anything since we didn't want our friendship to change in any way.

I tend to much more comfortable talking with a woman then a man in many circumstances.

I've had a few close guy friends, but not many. And some of them were actually more like "drinking buddies" then true friends since everytime we got together we drank, usually to excess.

Is there anyone else here who finds it easier to have a close friendship with a member of the opposite sex?

Les

[bigirl_inwv]

Yes! I have very few female friends, much less CLOSE female friends. All my life I have related more to men than women. I understand men better, I think like they do. And all the females that I do get along with are older than me. Females my own age tend to annoy me.

Glad to see Im not the only one who relates better to friends of the opposite sex.

[mistymockingbird]

I'm that way. I've always had more close male friends than female ones. Not sure why. On the surface you'd think it was because I like sports and drink beer but I know that it is more than that. I've just always felt more comfortable around guys. I enjoy the company of men. There have been a few guy friends I was sexually involved with at one point or another, but for the most part no. I am an affectionate person though. I tell my friends I love them, hugs and kisses hello and goodbye, that sort of thing.

I love chicks, as friends and otherwise, but my closest relationships in life have always been predominantly with guys. As far back as I can remember. I don't seek out male friendships, they just happen more naturally for me.

That's not to say I've never had a close friendship with a chick. I have. I just tend to have one, maybe two, chicks I'm close with at any given time and always have a whole bunch of guys around. My guys are usually gay. My best friend always laughs and says its because I'm really a gay man trapped in a woman's body. Who knows? I don't worry about it. It is what it is.

[TorontoGuy2007]

most reading i have done would indicate that both men and women tend to have more female best friends..

in my case, all my best friends are female. it's always been that way..

i've always seemed to relate better them and they better to me. i'm a very feminine and emotional kinda guy..

as far as guy friends, well, i guess they mostly fall under the "drinking buddy" category.. all i never talk about with my guy friends are sports and music..

guess guys just don't get emotional and intimate with each other in conversation.. guess that's society coming into play. sad isn't it.

[rockstarvomit]

Generally, I find myself to enjoy the company of boys more. I have close girlfriends, but with the boys theres wayy less drama and sometimes they give better advice. more straightforward anyway. To me, it's just easier to fall in with the boys.

[Lorcan]

yes, i'm with the girls who like boys for friends. The only thing is... well you seen When Harry Met Sally, right. I am currenty friendless, and i've given up on making friends because of that reason.

I'd rather have a drinking buddy...who i get to know slowly. Someone to DO stuff with, and ~occassionally~ talk.

[bm_jim]

I would have to say my friends range pretty well, I do tend to hang out with girlfriends but my best friends tend to guys. I think it may be in my submissive nature I lean towards dominating people for best friends (male and female) and guys tend to enjoy being more dominant, even if they are not of the lover quality or type.

[Long Duck Dong]

my best friend is my cat :tongue: :tongue: :tongue: :tongue:

i have male and female friends, and sexual partners.... but i don't place them in positions of status....

as for talking, I talk to the people i need to talk with about what needs to be talked about..... I would hardly talk to a Buddhist about the bible and its standing on homosexual and sexual expressions

yeah... i don't ask for advice..... call it pigheadedness or arrogance.... but i always have a open ear to advice offered freely..... even in the dumbest remarks can be a grain of wisdom...lol

so do i have closer male or female friends ??? mmm no.... the closest they get to me in laying in bed with me...lol.... that aside, I am not a open person.... despite the way i post in the forums...lol...... getting me to open up and reveal exactly who i am and am... is something that will never happen

[twodelta]

my best friend is my cat :tongue: :tongue: :tongue: :tongue:

This is Dave, and I'd have to say that my best friend is my wife, followed, of course, by my cat :bigrin: Actually, as far back as I can remember, a woman has always been my best friend. I've had some very good friends that are guys, but there always seems to be a sence of competition when around them, that just doesn't exist around women. I guess it's just easier to be myself around women than men. - Dave

[LoveLion]

I find it easier to make friend with females and I find that the friendships are easier and more confortable. I have many more female friends then males ones.

HOWEVER, as few as my male friends are, they are my true friends, the ones you share secrets with, the ones you will still be going to movies with and playing video games at 2 am with 30 years form now, the one's who's advice I really trust and the ones who's sentences you can always finish. By best friend is a male and we are just like a married couple lol. I have only have one other male friend, and he is nearly as close, but I hav not known him as long. Actually all three of us are really good friends so were like a married trio :bigrin:

So all in all, for me females are easier to make friends with and I have more, while male friendships are fewer but more meaningful

[coyotedude]

I have always much more comfortable with women than men. I've just never been into the macho thing. (My wife belches much better than I ever will!) Not that all guys are "that way" - but I don't do "guy stuff" all that well, truth be told.

But I value my few friendships with guys all the more for that, I suppose.

Peace

[Enoll]

My guy friends are much closer than the girls I'm friends with. Except for obvoiusly my girlfriend, who despite her relationship title is much more than a friend.
My guy friends and I have gone through tough times in each other's lives
with support from each of us, so there's less of a problem of the whole
guys not talking about feelings thing.
Plus the few girls I have as friends, are insane phsyco bitches, in a good way, especialy the insane gold digger pictured with me in my profile. heh.

Call me old fashioned but all of my closest friends are guys.

[MrFahrenheit]

In my case it's about 50/50. I do stuff with my male friends, and talk with my female friends. :)

[Lisa (va)]

My best friend (other than husband) happens to be female.

I tend to make friends equally amongst male and female. However I tend to be more open with female friends; it has been my experience that when a guy learns that you have dated both men and women they instantly start thinking of wild sex scenarios. But there are a few men friends I feel closer too than others, but basically it boils down to the individual.

Lisa

hugs n kisses

[DiamondDog]

I'm close friends with men more than women.

It's not that I don't like women but I relate better, I bond better, I feel more open, and I get more infatuated with men.

[littlerayofsunshine]

The first best friend I ever had was a boy (we we're both 4 yrs old) I grew up as a tomboy, and never developed any prissy ways. Don't mind getting dirty or rough housing. I have found men to be less judgemental and more open to the situations at hand and not worrying so much about if's and when's and talking themselves out of stuff. I can relate to them better and at times even think my brain is wired more like a males. My best friend now is my hubby. I don't have any close female friends at all. After all these years I wouldn't even know how to really develope a friendship with a woman, I would be very nervous that I would develope a crush on her or something and screw up the whole thing up. It has happened in the past. Gosh I sound like an idiot. Sorry.

[BiLissa]

As a kid, most of my friends were girls.... as a teenager, mostly males.. as an adult, a mix. I tend to be able to really relate to both sexes pretty well.

I don't have any close female friends now in my life (and miss that terribly...) ... I have found some nice girls on this site I very much enjoy talking to tho, and am looking forward to getting to know them better...

My best friend is Vin... after 15 years, he knows me better than anybody else ever. He's always there, no matter what, good and bad... he's supportive and he listens... he may not always understand, but he tries....

Again, another :2cents: from me

Hugs

~Lissa~

[innaminka]

I've always had a number of close female friends rather than males. ('cept lovely Deanie-Weanie!!! :tongue: hubby!!!)

I've always found it far easier to embrace a level of confidentiality with another woman rather rathan a guy. Lots of male acquaintences, but total close friends - doesn't work for me.
Maybe I see too many two-faced, hypocritical sh*ts who happen to be 99% male, in my job.

[ambi53mm]

I have very few friends but many acquaintances that I’m friendly with of both sexes. The one person that would top my list by my definition of friendship, also happens to be my wife. The one ingredient that friendships require most is time and there lies the biggest problem because there never seems to be enough time to develop meaningful ,quality friendships. Gender doesn’t play as much of a role as depth of character. This depth I usually find more often in women in general but I have met males that also seem to possess that quality as well, especially on this site. Superficial relationships are just too demanding and really are more of what I call a casual acquaintance of sorts.

I recall reading once something along the line of “You call a good friend to come bail you out of jail at 2am in morning…but your true friend would be sitting there with you”. LOL Probably screwed that up but it illustrates a very genuine perspective of how I perceive friendship.

Ambi :)

[the sacred night]

I don't have any real close friends except my fiance right now, but I have a lot of acquaintances of both sexes. I get along best with men and butch women, but I guess that's because I'm a butch woman myself.

I don't find that straight men start thinking kinky thoughts when they find out I'm bi, although I'm sure they would if I was hotter. As it is, anyone who's known me longer than five minutes can see I'm not one of those drunk chicks that says "I'm bi!" to get attention, so they know my bisexuality doesn't mean they're ever getting any. My butchiness and my bisexuality both seem to make the guys at work see me as just "one of the guys." They love talking about women with me, and one of them said "It's so cool, I can say 'tits' and you don't get offended!" I like seeing what guys say when "girls" aren't around... there are quotes around that because I'm obviously around, but I guess I don't quite count.

I get along with butch women for the same reasons I guess... both hyper-femme women and hyper-macho men are supremely annoying to me. Not that they're bad people, they're just not my type. I find some desirable and some undesirable traits in both sexes, so a really good friend for me will have good traits from both sides and hopefully minimal bad traits from both sides.
I like a little androgyny, both for a friend and a partner.

[deremarc]

I'm a straight female. I have several longstanding friendships with girls. But, it is funny...we all say that we are so close because most of us are what we call "girls that act more like guys". Not that any of us are bi, or feel like men trapped in women's bodies...but because our friendships lack all of that drama, and competition and gossip that so many of the relationships with women seem to have.

In high school, my best friends were guys (really hot guys...lol) and the girls were always mad at me...thought I had some kind of handle on them...but they really just considered me one of the guys....

Now, when it comes to who I hang out with on the weekends...I will pick a table of guys way more often than not. I don't go out to discuss recipes or my kids, I go out to have fun. Guys seem to do better at just hanging with who ever is there...and they are so much fun! And, when a guy is not looking to bed a girl, he cares a lot less what you are wearing or look like than the girls themselves do...funny, huh?

I guess guys are just so "easy" for me...and I love to watch the way they interact...the way they think...they absolutely fascinate me. (unfortunately all of that understanding of guys goes out the window when I am in a relationship...and then I am back to not understanding them at all sometimes :( )

And, this is a side note, but girls seem to be competitive a lot of the time...and I have kids and I see it all the time...get 3 girls in a room..and watch out..one will be left out....but my sons can happily hang out with whomever is there...and their fights are just that...a few words..and over...and back to having fun. When I would have trouble with a girl at work, my ex-husband would say to tell her to f### off. LOL I told him that works with guys, and then they go have a beer. But, with girls, you can look at her crooked and she's mad for weeks. Anyone else see those differences? Or, is it just the area I live in?

[Lorcan]

I am currenty friendless,

'Course i didn't include my husband who is the best friend i've ever had. Thinking about that only reminds me that if i lost him, i wouldn't have one of my two reasons to live.

And i didn't include friends that i made in the past, and i can't meet them in person cuz i moved, so i have to e-mail them.

But it was cool all the guy friends i had in college.... i could go to parties where there were all guys and me. I was told i had an honorary male membership card! :bigrin: Only thing was, i had a partner who wouldn't share me with other males, so everyone knew they couldn't have me. So they just put that aside, and treated me like a person.

Here, they know my husband shares me.... they don't know the details (i can't tell them/my husband doesn't want to be out). So everyone thinks, she's easy, i can have her. This one guy at work was actually trying to bait me for the longest time, telling everyone that he'd get me. Gawd. If they all knew that the prime requisite was to service my husband first... :eek: