What does "bisexual" mean to you?

[bi42guy1958]

For many, bisexual can mean lots of things pertaining to being with both sexes. For me I choose to break the word down and define it. BI; meaning of 2, in this case both men and women. sexual; meanig of a sexual nature (not loving). In other words, sexually I love both men and women, but when it comes to having those loving feelings its only with women. I enjoy the visuals, touching, stroking, oral with both sexes. With the opposite sex there is way more involved. I care nothing about a romantic relationship with a man. As a matter of fact, after the "moment" with a guy, its "OK, dont touch me now."


I offered some advice to someone else here on the site, as this is a part of it. I was wondering how many others feel the same way? Is it the same for men and women? Am I that much out of the norm on this?

[allbimyself]

I agree. The capability to be in love with either gender would make one biamorous.

[elian]

I usually satisfy myself enough so that being perpetually horny isn't a problem.

I have felt physical attraction and romantic feelings toward both genders at times. I usually say that what matters to me is the whole person, not just what's between their legs. Of course, sometimes depending on hormones, this neat tidy little description just won't do..and that definition just won't do for society in general..people who think being "bi" is easy have no clue.

Intellectually and spiritually the thought of having sex with someone just to have sex really don't appeal to me that much. I like the companionship and friendship - and if something more happens then great. Right now there are lots of times I'd still like to be alone - but I can't imagine being 70 years old and STILL being alone.

-E

[mrplayfuluk]

I think its admitting to myself that i can be attracted to someone of the same sex as well as my historic attraction of the opposite sex. I haven't yet acted on it but the desire is definitely there. Never been one for the zipless fuck with the opposite sex and so can't imagine the same with another guy but it provides good fantasies. I think any same sex liason would have to involve a bit of getting to know them and liking them as an acquaintance...

[DiamondDog]

I can fall in love with both genders and while I'm probably more into men for sex, romance, affection, and relationships that doesn't mean that I don't have these feelings for certain women or that I never did, and I go through periods where I'm very equal and also times when I don't want women at all. As I get older I've moved beyond the label of bisexual. I don't use the label of biamorous though.

[thinkfree39]

I haven't decided if I fit the label as "a bisexual", but I have bisexual thoughts. I think I'm just missing something with my partner which gives me the urge to find it with a man. It's mostly just physical.

[Moto1]

The gender of my partner doesn't matter to me.

There are physical traits I am attracted to, there are mental traits I am attracted to. These may be more common, or found almost exclusively in one gender; but nevertheless if someone fills all the criteria, gender isn't an issue.

So really I'm a Idon'tcaresexual. It isn't that I like both genders, I just don't discriminate at all on gender. They are both the same thing to me (sexually).

That being said, I prefer women's bodies, and usually their minds, so I am almost always attracted to women rather than men. (Hence the guys I go for tend to be pretty androgynous.) However that doesn't change that the fact that a guy is a guy doesn't make me like them any less than the fact a girl is a girl.

[ChsnyNLelandsBsh]

I have a definite desire to be with a female.....not much with the opposite sex (male) though.....to be with a male...after the crap Ive been through with them...I dont have much of a desire....I did a while ago before I went through the last relationship but it definitely shifted towards females....I really have a sexual attraction....towards females....a lil bit on males too...but not as much as I used to...

[DiamondDog]

The gender of my partner doesn't matter to me.

There are physical traits I am attracted to, there are mental traits I am attracted to. These may be more common, or found almost exclusively in one gender; but nevertheless if someone fills all the criteria, gender isn't an issue.

So really I'm a Idon'tcaresexual. It isn't that I like both genders, I just don't discriminate at all on gender. They are both the same thing to me (sexually).

That being said, I prefer women's bodies, and usually their minds, so I am almost always attracted to women rather than men. (Hence the guys I go for tend to be pretty androgynous.) However that doesn't change that the fact that a guy is a guy doesn't make me like them any less than the fact a girl is a girl.

interesting.

I also don't discriminate against someone's gender but I prefer men's bodies and their minds, and I do connect with men on a lot more levels that I don't with most women.

Back to the definition though it's someone who's sexually attracted to both genders and you don't have to fall in love with both genders and you can be a virgin to one or both genders, you can just fantasize about sex with one/both genders, and still be bisexual.

[diB4u]

To me, well thats a good question because I'm still finding that one out.
One day it can mean just a sexual attraction towards women ie just wanting to do stuff with. Other day's its seeking an emotional connection with other women.

Having a realtionship - at the moment that's what the term bisexual means to me.

Sometimes I find it hard to find the right sort of people who just accepts me for who I am. Being Pansexual and Androgyne makes it slightly difficult. My ideas and wants change on a daily basis.

[Long Duck Dong]

For many, bisexual can mean lots of things pertaining to being with both sexes. For me I choose to break the word down and define it. BI; meaning of 2, in this case both men and women. sexual; meaning of a sexual nature (not loving).


that rules me out as a bisexual..... i'm celibate lol

for me, being bisexual means that I can be attracted to both genders sexual or non sexual... and at this stage of my life, its in a non sexual manner

I am the type of person that perfers friendship and / or love over fuck buddies and causal encounters....

to me, when we reduce bisexual nature to simple sex.... it makes us look like people that only cares about fucking and being fucked and we don't give a shit about anything else..... and thats just a personal opinion... its not aimed at anybody.....

[mrplayfuluk]

that rules me out as a bisexual..... i'm celibate lol

to me, when we reduce bisexual nature to simple sex.... it makes us look like people that only cares about fucking and being fucked and we don't give a shit about anything else..... and thats just a personal opinion... its not aimed at anybody.....

With the greatest respect LDD, this is a generalisation of us all by you. Like all sexual orientations, bisexuality is fluid and varied. So for some of us its purely sexual for whatever personal reasons or experiences. For many so called bicurious people, every bi experience whether emotional or sexual its a big thing, a step across the blurred line. I believe that those who may define themselves as gay at some point, have got to that point because of cultural and life experiences, and not due to biological processes (ie. that they were always gay). Personally I don't care how others perceive bisexuals, in the greater society, its how each individual perceives themselves which is fascinating and informing....

[ar_bi_guy_4cpl]

This is a very interesting thread for me. Just yesterday i was told by a fellow that i am not bi because i dont care for anal sex. I suppose I am a bit more shallow than the rest of yall. I call myself orally bi since a year or 2 ago i tasted my first cock in the heat of the moment and liked it. The part that makes me shallow is the fact that to me Love is Love and sex is sex. I like the excitement of new experiences with different people. To me variety is the spice of life, and i dont want just a salt and pepper diet. But again i have no emotional attraction to men ... just a desire to participate in sexual experiences that excite me.

[rmorti]

I feel im going to be like bi 42 and mr playful uk. I have the history of 20 years with women and have just discovered my possible bisexuality. I still struggle to grip with the idea of being with a man and to be honest, cant get turned on by thoughts of it or watching gay porn, yet I deffinetly notice good looking men. If I do things, I feel once its done, I wont really want much more with them, whilst with girls I just love it. The cuddling, kissing, being the protector etc. It may change when I actualy try it, but to me, thast how I see my bisexuality at the moment.

[ambi53mm]

I became aware of my sexual nature long before it was directed outwardly towards either gender. My arousal was a result of exploring and being stimulated by my own body. I’m male, so to some extent the male body (Mine) became the object of my fascination. The physical sensations of sight, touch smell, taste, coupled with my mind through imagination and fantasy produced the pleasurable sensations that I came to understand as sexual arousal.
Within the limited circle of family this activity was looked down upon and can recall being punished for expressing my sexual nature either through exposing myself through exhibition or through masturbation. I went undercover usually under the covers.
When my socialization began outwardly I was indoctrinated and initiated into male only groups of boys no different than myself. We played as boys will play and so my earliest sexual adventures were with other boys. I was fascinated by some that were older than myself when I saw how huge there cocks could become and I think that was the beginning of my journey towards a same “sex” fascination. My attractions towards the opposite sex was always there but began simply enough as a curiosity towards an anatomy that didn’t include penis. The sexual desire to explore the female body was there but wasn’t as easily accessible until a later period in my life.
The more complex my socialization became, I began to learn and except what was considered socially acceptable sexual attractions and what was considered socially taboo. Orientation towards one sex over another was reinforced in every aspect of my life. As boys we still played with one another undercover but it was never talked about. When the mystery of the female body came more into my easy reach it was no contest as to which I found the most enjoyment with sexually and that continues until this day. I enjoy what I’ve always enjoyed sexually with the same sex but still it’s undercover. I enjoy what I enjoy with the opposite sex and it’s perceived by most as being my only preference. But the truth is I enjoy sex with either or both genders and they call that being “bisexual”.

Ambi:)

[Long Duck Dong]

With the greatest respect LDD, this is a generalisation of us all by you. Like all sexual orientations, bisexuality is fluid and varied. So for some of us its purely sexual for whatever personal reasons or experiences. For many so called bicurious people, every bi experience whether emotional or sexual its a big thing, a step across the blurred line. I believe that those who may define themselves as gay at some point, have got to that point because of cultural and life experiences, and not due to biological processes (ie. that they were always gay). Personally I don't care how others perceive bisexuals, in the greater society, its how each individual perceives themselves which is fascinating and informing....


where was I generalising.....????

I expressed a personal opinion about how I perceived the idea of reducing bisexuality to a simple sexual desire and said that its not directed or aimed at anybody

I said that if we reduce bisexuality to simple sex... then my celibate status would mean that I am not bisexual

it removes the emotional and mental aspects to being bisexual

and thats why I said that if we reduce bisexuality to simple sex... then my celibate status would mean that I am not bisexual

and again, thats a personal opinion... its not a generalisation about the rest of the bisexual community

[allbimyself]

I disagree, LDD. I'm sorry, bisexuality is about sexuality or it wouldn't be "bisexuality." Sexuality is about sex and sexual attraction. It doesn't require that one acts on the attraction, however.



I said that if we reduce bisexuality to simple sex... then my celibate status would mean that I am not bisexual

No, it wouldn't mean that, not any more than, say, a celibate nun is not straight, gay or bi.


it makes us look like people that only cares about fucking and being fucked and we don't give a shit about anything else
There are people like that of every orientation, however, not being romantically attracted to both sexes but being sexually attracted to both doesn't make someone less of a person either. I'm not romantically attracted to guys but that doesn't mean I'm a slut either (I am but for other reasons LOL). I won't have sex with a guy I don't like, I have to respect and like the person, no matter their gender. The difference is I don't think I'm capable of falling in love with a man. Maybe I am, hasn't ever happened so I doubt it.

Let me turn your words around. I'm not romantically inclined towards men, only women, but I have sex with both. By your definition I'm not bisexual. WTF am I?

[CMack]

The only reason I would even use the word bisexual or even bi, would be out of convenience to someone else. For myself, I don't really like labels. I used to think that they were necessary as most people need labels to describe things, such as cat, dog, priest, king, thief etc... It is difficult not to use a label in a world of labels. I think that until we learn how to communicate through simply thought, we kinda have to. What am I? I am me! Do I like women? yes, I am married to one. Do I like men? Yes, I have been in a relationship with one in the past. These facts still don't have to necessarily label me, but I have noticed one thing: a label is like a badge and a badge can attract and connect. How on earth would we know to come to "bisexual.com" without a label guiding us?

[jedinudist]

I'm sexually attracted to both genders, but only Love my wife. I can care about another guy on a friendship level, but romantic feelings have just never been there.

[Long Duck Dong]

.

Let me turn your words around. I'm not romantically inclined towards men, only women, but I have sex with both. By your definition I'm not bisexual. WTF am I?

you are bisexual.... you have feelings, emotions, understanding, thoughts, desires, needs and wants...and you can have sexual relationships with both genders

I don't see allbymyself: the bisexual sex machine........ I see allbymyself the bisexual, mature, intelligent and very pleasant to talk to, person

to me, a person is bisexual all the time... not just when they are having sex...

that why I say that if we reduce being bisexual to the times when a person is having sex.... then by that ruling, my bisexuality doesn't exist

[thinkfree39]

I think love and sex always remain separate things. If you are in a relationship where there is both they become intertwined and it's difficult to see the difference. It may not even be necessary to see the difference but it is still there. Love involves an ongoing trust. Sex is a gratification and in the case of a loving relationship, is an expression of that relationship.

But that doesn't cheapen a satisfying sexual encounter with someone you don't love. You can have one without the other and that doesn't make it cheap any more than a simple act of kindness to a stranger is cheap.