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Mr. Magick
Jun 9, 2008, 5:16 AM
Hi folks, I wrote this as a little exercise piece, trying to get back into writing regularly again. It is not my best stuff but it was fun to write. I thought maybe some of you may enjoy it. It is my feelings on the subject of pansexuality. It is not intended to be an accurate definition and it definately is not meant to be accusing or hurtful in any way. I hope you like it.


I think I’m the first Pansexual male in my family history; then again, maybe not. Just what is the definition of Pansexuality? Identifying as Gay or Straight or even Bi has always caused stress in my life. I can’t tell you with any truth what I like sexually, it changes. The fact is sometimes I’m into a guy sometimes a girl. Sometimes I like kinky sometimes I just want to make love, soft and gentle. Sometimes a combination of any or all of these things and more. It’s the natural ebb and flow of the human sexual tide in me. You see, for me that’s what Pansexuality is all about, that tendency to fluctuate. It embodies and embraces sexual freedom. The freedom to explore things I never before imagined I would do.

It’s more than a gender preference; Pansexuality spans the entire landscape of sex. Every fetish, every gender choice, every decision made that goes beyond what we once found to be the very limit of our sexuality is in essence Pansexuality. It shouldn’t be taboo to be with someone you desire, even if it’s outside your normal sexual identity. It should be alright to try something you once found repugnant. Why do we as a people find it necessary to put ourselves and others in little boxes to be filed away under this thing or that thing? Is it really so wrong to climb out of your box and into another for a while?

Pansexuality is a word created to be used by those who feel it necessary to put people into easy to manage groups. For those of us who can’t be put into nice neat little groups they made up a word. That’s ok with me. If it makes you feel better, I don’t particularly care what you call me. In fact I’ve more or less embraced the word. So now I’m in a group, nice and easy to manage right? Except this group includes most of the people I’ve met. In my opinion Pansexuality is more of a philosophy than an identity. Anyone who has ever tried something new, or made love to someone they had never before thought of as a possible sexual partner has made a pansexual decision. The guy in prison who ends up in the arms of another man out of sheer loneliness and never does it again when he gets out has still made a pansexual choice. The person who has never tried bondage or anal or any one of a dozen other things has made a pansexual choice once they have tried it. A guy I knew in the army told me how he and his buddies used to go out and sleep with girls they found unattractive. He presented it as a kind of contest, but he admitted that he had never been with one of these girls when he didn’t have a good time. Pansexuality is all about expanding boundaries. It’s about not letting those few who are stuck in their comfort zones tell you where you are supposed to be. Why can’t a gay man sleep with a woman he finds attractive. As a gay friend of mine once said “I can see that I am a sexual creature, it’s my emotional attachments that are same sex”. Is that really going to change all that much if you allow yourself to desire another type of person? And so what if it does? Do your feelings really threaten you so much?

I’m not saying to deliberately do things you don’t want to do. I’m saying that if you find yourself with feelings or desires you don’t understand don’t let it cause you a lot of stress. Pansexuality is about being willing to explore your horizons. Like anything else, it’s not for everyone. It is possible to identify as almost entirely Gay or Straight or Bi and still be Pansexual. In the end I guess you could say that Pansexuality is more about learning to love yourself and all of the things you may become than who you make love to or how.
Just some food for thought.

Peace, Love and Pan-Cakes for everyone!
Mr. Magick

kitten
Jun 9, 2008, 10:09 AM
Interesting thoughts and encouragements. Thank you for sharing!
I'll have some of those pan-cakes now!

hugs,
kitten

Annika L
Jun 9, 2008, 10:22 PM
Interesting thoughts...and fascinating timing for this post! I was just talking with someone the other day, and a question arose that Mr. Magick may be able to help out with.

Would you happen to have a personal distinction between Pansexuality and omnisexuality that you could describe?

Thanks so much!

FalconAngel
Jun 9, 2008, 11:39 PM
Seems to me;
Pansexual, Omnisexual, Bisexual?

The name of the rose.

Mr. Magick
Jun 10, 2008, 4:31 AM
I have to agree with Falconangel that the three terms really have no significant difference, so the differences are in the eye of the beholder. Bi sexuality is an established identity and provides a safe haven for those that need to be defined. Nothing wrong with that. Pansexuality and Omnisexuality appear to be the same thing so looking at the root of the words is what I would do to separate them, if thats what you wish to do. Omnisexuality, to me, feels more like its saying that one is alway attracted to all forms of sexuality. No fluctuation or variance in ones feelings. Where as Pansexuality tends to say that its ok not to always be into guys as much girls or any other combination. I personally tend to fluctuate. Right now I'm more into guys. A couple of weeks ago I was very much into women with tattoos and the list goes on and on. Again this is just a personal thought on the matter and not drawn from any existing definition of the words.

softfruit
Jun 10, 2008, 3:28 PM
In my opinion Pansexuality is more of a philosophy than an identity.

That bit is a really interesting way of looking at it, especially in conjunction with the comment later about gay pansexuals etc. I meet a few people online and in the real world who use the pansexual label rather than bisexual, and mostly it seems to be a matter of hiding from negative connotations of "bisexual", like copping out of tackling biphobia. Nice to distinguish it as a philosophy rather than a 'new' sexual orientation, it is more coherent that way :)

Mr. Magick
Jun 15, 2008, 7:47 AM
Thanks for all the positive feed back, I really appreciate it.