I turned 35 saturday

[indigohippiechic]

So..I turned 35 on Saturday--trying hard to wrap my head around that. this year, my daughter informed me she was Bi--she is 16. I went back to being bi myself cuz I got hurt by a woman who I thought was THE one. I don't know what is going on with me--I used to never look twice at a butch..they weren't attractive to me--but now--I can't stop looking--I know I am not happy being bi-but I am not straight either...nor am I 100% lesbian..I just don't understand anymore.

I am so angry all the time. I want to find work--or finish school so I can start a career..but every time I try--everything falls apart.One of my friends died on Thanksgiving--from a house fire. My biological sister finally came out of the wood-work..haven't seen her since I was a baby--I got one email from her in November--none since. My legal husband claims he will give me a divorce--hasn't happened yet...My boyfriend tells me to go find a new girlfriend but I am not sure I want that kind of pain again. I feel like my life is spiraling out of control...

I am sorry for laying this all on you guys--but I didn't know where else to turn. No one else listens...and no one else cares...so it seems..they all just say get over it...please don't say get over it--I am not asking for advice(though I will welcome it) I just want an ear..or in this case eyes.


:bipride:

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

First of all..HAPPY BIRTHDAY Honey!!!:color::bday::bdaygrin::bounce::rainbow:

OMG, to be 35 again. I wouldnt know what to do with myself. My oldest child was 15, the middle one was 14, and the youngest was 13, my ex never knew I was bi, and had been married to a Viet Nam Vet with PTSD since I was 17. And, three years later I lost my Mom to cancer..

Life is hard Darlin, but we have to be strong and learn how to be a survivor and over come it. I had to learn to be strong enough to handle any eventually that came along, and so will you. :} Things at this time of the season especially, looks bleak, but just try to stay focused and get your head some peace, then continue on.

Start looking and moving forward. Its the best you can do for You. Find a good support group too, that way you can get some of this stuff off of your chest, and out of your heart and mind. If you let it set in there all its going to do is fester and get worse. Let it go and find viable solutions.
Good Luck Sweetie, and Never give up.
Been there, done that Cat. :bigrin:

[PearlGirl]

I'm 35 also. Keep trying to get through school but something always gets in the way. Looking for work again at the moment. I'm feeling old for the first time in my life so I can relate to your post. I agree w/the support group idea. That's something I am pursuing right now and it sure helps to know that we are not alone. Hang in there. Without the bad times feeling so bad- we'd never really feel how joyful the good times are. If it doesn't kill us it will make us stronger.:girl:

[Realist]

Hey, you better get on the stick and live it up, while you still have the facilities. I promise you the worst is yet to come! You've probably got at least another 20 good years ahead.

If you think 35's bad, wait until you're 68!! A lot of body parts you didn't even know you had will remind you of their location, every morning!

And, some body parts that never failed you before, will suddenly go to sleep right in the middle of the best event of the month!

Like the old song said: "Don't tell me your troubles, I've got troubles of my own!"

'Nuff said............................

[indigohippiechic]

Well--here it is July, half way to my next birthday, thought Id give an update--

so, still no job, but I have two books published (on kindle) and one that is a compilation of the two for sale on lulu.com

boyfriend and I are getting on much better, still no girlfriend in the picture. Husband STILL hasnt given me a divorce( and says he wont so long as it is boyfriend I am with) My daughter is "happily" ensconced in a relationship with the Almighty, and--no support group yet, but I did get diagnosed with diabetes in April--and I have finally gotten a fair grip on my anger issues.

I thank you all, both those who posted in public and my one message in private for lending me your eyeballs and your advice

Ja, atto dea
(see you later):female:

[grneyedbeauty]

In most states you can get divorced without his consent if you know where he lives and can have him served. If he doesn't show your divorced. Thats what I did and it only cost $1500

[indigohippiechic]

wouldnt be able to afford 1500$...but thanx

[still_shy]

It really depends on the state you live in. If you call the courthouse, they will tell you what the filing fee is for divorce. In Indiana, you pay $120 filing fee and they give you a big packet to fill out. It's fairly easy, I did it at 25 years old with zero legal experience. In court, the judge was understanding that I couldn't afford a lawyer and walked me through the process. I don't know if your state allows people to act as their own attorney for civil procedures or not. My advice to you is to call and find out. It was the best thing I ever did for myself and my daughter. Never underestimate a good sense of closure.

On another note, I'm very glad to hear that things are looking up for you. I hope they continue to improve :)

[thatcher29]

IHC, if you're still living in Oregon, a quick Google found people that will do a legal divorce for you from $135 to $300. And that's without any court appearances.

[Realist]

I began a new career at 34, so that's not too old to begin all over again.

Get away from a bad situation and try not to repeat the same old mistakes; I was lucky to have another chance.

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

I know this is an old thread...
Hon, you can even consult a Paralegal and they will get you the necessary paperwork you You fill it out. They will even helpyou but you have to do it primarily on your own. They then file it, get it to the courts and you can even get a restraining order thru them if you need to.
Theres always better solutions than spending an arm, leg and three toes..lol
Hope things have changed for the better for you. :}
Cat