Why Gays shouldnt marry..a parody..:}

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

This has Probably been posted before but I find it funny..:}
Cat

10 Reasons Why Gay Marriage is Wrong
.by Will McGarvey on Sunday, August 15, 2010 at 8:12pm.10 Reasons Why Gay Marriage is Wrong (reposting Mitchell Sturges)

01) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

02) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

03) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

04) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

05) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

06) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

07) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

08) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

09) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

Re-post this if you believe love makes a marriage.

[niftyshellshock]

I love this post every time it pops up :D

[DuckiesDarling]

Nice one, Cat. It never fails to amuse me when people try to decide what is normal or abnormal. Hell when it comes down to it I'm happy to be normally abnormal or is that abnormally normal? :tong:

[void()]

All in good fun, gotta chuckle and crack wise. :)



10 Reasons Why Gay Marriage is Wrong
.by Will McGarvey on Sunday, August 15, 2010 at 8:12pm.10 Reasons Why Gay Marriage is Wrong (reposting Mitchell Sturges)

01) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

Dolphins, pigs, dogs, cats ... almost every animal breed has homosexuality. It's a naturally occurring fact which can be observed. And gee don't you know, human beings are animals as well. "Nah, not natural t'all."


02) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.


Sure and listening to the heavy metal group Suicidal Tendencies will cause you to commit suicide, heck they even got suicide in their name.

03) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

Darn. Thought a relationship between me and Duckie's goats was special. They did tell me I was the only one. Guess I'll just marry up to Cat's iguanas now.


04) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

Funny, my wife says I'm property and my little black ass has to work like a slave or else! She gets to go to those funny parties with her white friends, they wear those fancy sheets and dance 'round crosses on fire.


05) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

Does anything really have meaning? Seriously a bit here, who creates this meaning stuff?

06) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

Well guess I need to get a divorce and stay unmarried. Don't figure I'll ever father human children, it's a medical thing. At times it bugs me but mostly I just enjoy fucking the wife without worrying about the extra expense of children. :)

07) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

Ayup. And if you toss children out into the wilderness you get Rome, then America by extension. Read up on your history, Romulas & Remus.


08) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

Just one, huh? It must be worship of The Almighty Dollar, it's got "In God We Trust" on the back. The word mortgage is Latin borrowed from the Christian sect, means death oath. You forfeit your life to pay the Church to buy land. Now, they hide behind banks but it's all the same jazz anyway. so, yep yep ... gotta be the buck as our God.


09) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

Uh huh, right. My mom raised three gentleman on her own. Yes we raised unholy hell as boys, that's the nature of boys. But mom got us squared and we all three contribute to family, all three take responsibilities, are compassionate. She had my step dad who was really never here, trucker. So, she was alone. Yeah, I turned out bisexual, my brothers are pure straight. Probably was from sunspots or bad tuna.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

I'm still trying to figure out this erm .. ah .. w h eel thang. It rolls, moves. How they do that? It has to be square! Help I'm trapped in a magic word box with a funny hole gaping out into the world! It's the work of those Commie devils! Or is it the North Koreans? I better go lay down in that hole my wifey dug out.

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

LOL Ah Void, you're precious. Bad tuna huh? I hadn't thought of that one....
And the Iguana's are all excited now...both of em.. Snicker.
Cat
PS I didnt even know I Had Iguana's til you said something.......I thot that was just Eegies next door neighbor friends.