[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]It was... weird; I was just so used to having someone else put it in and fuck me and there was nothing for me to do, if you know what I mean so getting... coordinated took a moment or two until I got in the groove. It felt amazing but really weird because while it was shaped and modeled after a real dick, I could now understand why so many women said that having this kind of toy was nice... but it was no replacement for the real thing. I had positioned myself so I could watch myself... fucking myself and it was surreal to see this big, fat, coal black, rubbery thing sliding in and out of my ass. It was still kinda hard to concentrate on fucking myself while jerking myself off but I was managing it - but I was having a bit of... mental difficulty because I could feel myself getting to the part of things where I was more than ready to feel cum being shot into me but, oh, yeah, that's right: That ain't gonna happen. But it was feeling good; I could feel it against my prostate and I'd given up on my original thought to take it easy on myself and was slamming in into my ass as hard and fast as I could manage - not easy now that some of the lube had gotten on my fingers and I couldn't grip it all that well. Then the condom broke and I felt it the moment it did but stopping was out of the question because I had to cum so bad it wasn't funny; I'd worry about getting the pieces out later and if I had to. I came... and did so in spectacular fashion; the first shot hit me dead in the face and the second one got me in the eye since, um, I was watching the action I was performing on myself. Every time my dick pulsed, I could seriously feel my hole clamping down on the unresisting toy - the real thing has some... give in it but, damn, damn, damn! This was pretty intense just the same.[/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]Her new toy got a lot of usage, whether she had her alone time with it or she'd let me do her with it - while eating her - and so much that I joked with her that it might have to be replaced with a more durable one because she was pretty much wearing it out. Now, I gotta say that eating her while her toy was at work didn't taste all that good to me but I "took one for the team" because her pleasure was more important than my taste buds being pissed off. I was putting her underwear and stuff up after doing the laundry one day and her toy was sitting right there and, whew - that poor thing was in some pretty bad shape; the "veins" didn't stand out as much as they did when it was brand new and was it my imagination or was the knob quite a bit smaller now? I laughed to myself... then the thought popped into my head that, hmm, checking it out myself sounds like a good idea. After doing a bit of cleaning back there, I scrounged around for a condom, got all nice and lubed up and pressed the knob against my hole... and pushed. In retrospect, I can't really say what I was thinking other than I knew I'd had real dicks just as big and fat as her toy was but as the knob started to go in, holy shit! It was like I could [I]hear[/I] it stretching my hole open! I pulled it back, added a whole lot of lube to it - it was a lubricated condom but that shit wasn't helping any. I started again and this time the knob went in easier and the rest of it was going in until I got as much of it in me that I could and still be able to hold onto it. It made me write a mental note to get her one that had a "handle" on it... and I started to fuck myself with it.[/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]Once we got back home, she was trying not to act like a kid with a new toy and I couldn't keep my laughter in as she was talking about why getting it out of its packaging and, at the least, giving it a good washing and drying made sense. "Honey, if you wanna check it out now, just go ahead and do what you gotta do," I said - in between giggles. "Oh, okay," she said, giving me a look that said she didn't appreciate me finding her eagerness funny. "Do you wanna watch?" "Do you want me to? If you need some alone time with it, I'm good with that," I said honestly. She thought about it for a moment and decided that it would be nice if I'd eat her first then she could put her new toy to the test and I found that it's kinda hard to eat pussy and trying not to laugh at the same time since the whole time I was eating her, she had her new toy in her hand and so tightly that if it was a real dick, the guy attached to it would be begging her to ease up on the grip. After about four very wet orgasms, it was showtime and I could see her nervousness; one of the things she pointed out was that her new toy was much longer and fatter than I was and, as she said, "It might not fit!" I sat beside her and just watched the look on her face as she rubbed the huge knob against her pussy, getting it good and wet - then pushed the knob in; her eyes got really big and even bigger as she pushed the dildo into herself, sometimes gasping as inch after inch went in until the only part left out of her was just enough for her to get a grip on... which was almost all of it. Then she got to work and I just sat beside her and held her as she fucked herself, slowly at first, but then with more purpose. Given that she was a squirter, it didn't surprise me when, after getting it deep inside, she came so hard the damned thing shot out of her with a rather loud pop - and then so hard and fast she lost her grip on it and it wound up down around her ankles. As she gasped through that strong orgasm, I kinda smiled and reached down to retrieve it and handed it back to her - but she pushed it and my hand away and said, "Gimme the real thing!" It was my pleasure to do so, of course...[/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]My first wife and I were sitting around and just talking when she asked, "Would you be upset if I got a dildo?" I said that I wouldn't be but, of course, I asked her why she wanted one and she said, "Oh, you know, for those times when a girl has to do what a girl has to do." I just nodded and said, "Well, let's go see what the adult place has to offer!" The kids were with their grandmother so off we went to one of the few remaining adult book stores that had toys. We must have spent an hour looking at all they had to offer and I was getting a private kick out of how nervous she was knowing that she's looking at the many dildoes on display and there are a lot of other people roaming around looking for stuff. She'd look at one and ask me what I thought about it... and I managed to keep myself from laughing but I'd say that she should pick whichever one she thought would best serve her purposes because, after all, she was gonna be the one using it. She finally settled on what I'd call a rather "vanilla" dildo; nine inches, maybe five inches in diameter with a huge knob and a lot of large "veins" all along the shaft but not with a handle at the bottom; they had several with a handle but they were out of our price range and, of course, it was made out of some kind of rubber or latex. I almost peed on myself as she took it to the counter to pay for it and the guy at the register was nodding his approval of her choice and she was so embarrassed that he said to her not to be and most of his dildo customers were women. It probably didn't make her feel any better and she was in quite a hurry to get back in the car.[/SIZE][/FONT]
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[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]Being easy and making it easy to have sex with me has served me well with both men and women; it's the reason why I've had so much sex throughout my life and more so because I really don't care about the stuff that other people are so concerned about. Nothing matters other than your desire to have sex and I did, most certainly, learned that when you make it harder, you're not gonna get any from anyone. I value desire over skill; you ain't gotta be a porn star - you just gotta want to do it and to the best of your ability because it's all I can do. I don't want or need to be impressed so don't trouble yourself trying to impress me... because I'm not going to try to impress you - it's unnecessary. Just do the best you can do - I can't ask for anything more than that and, again, I can only do the best I can do. Be of legal age to have sex; be clean and healthy; don't give me a reason to think you're gonna be my idea of an asshole. If you can't get me into your bed, chances are it's something you said or did and it's not because I don't want to be there. Nothing else matters because I don't think it should; anything else that matters only serves to make sure I'm not getting the sex I want. Easy, right? Not all that much of a secret. And the most important part of this is I am always prepared to deal with the consequences of my actions. Not much scares me and I don't scare easily to begin with. If there's something that two guys can do that I haven't done, it's probably because I didn't want to do it. And I live by a code that was put in place a very long time ago: I won't tell if you won't.[/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]Of course and just like anyone else, there's some shit I ain't ever gonna do, oh, like, if you wanted to tie me up and just use the shit out of me, the answer is no; got a fetish I ain't feeling? Nope - can't help you; I'm not dressing up like a girl or playing with your feet, giving or taking golden showers - stuff like that. What? You want me to tie you up and beat on you and make you submit to whatever I feel like doing? Eh, no and I will tell you that it would not be a good thing for you since I long ago learned that I like "beating on people during sex" way too much for my own comfort so, that would be a definite no. Roleplaying? I don't have the patience for it and I'm too literal-minded about having sex because while sex is fun, it's not a game to me... and I had that cousin who, I guess, "made sure" that sexual role playing was gonna be something I wasn't going to like a whole lot. Having said that, if it's something we can both agree on and you meet my three criteria, the only thing I wanna know now is when and where? Easy, right? I'd guess that for a lot of guys, going out of my way to make it easier might sound terribly risky and maybe even dangerous and to that I say what I've always said: I'm horny... not stupid; if I get the slight whiff of something that ain't quite right, the answer is no and that's my final answer; thanks to the mistakes I've seen others make, when in doubt, I just won't. Do I worry about catching something? Of course I do but I'll also point out that I have [B]never[/B] caught anything nasty. Never. Because I do know how to say no; it's just that I don't go out of my way to find reasons to say no to anyone. But if you give me one, guess what ain't gonna happen? I even know what to look for when it comes to a healthy dick and I just might be the smartest person you'll ever meet because I do know some stuff about that... because I learned that not knowing this stuff is what gets people in serious trouble when it comes to sex... and I still trust my instincts more than I will trust anything you have to say. They haven't been wrong yet. My secret isn't that much of one. Nine times out of ten, I've already decided to say yes... unless you fuck up and give me a reason to say no. I never - and still don't - give a shit about the things a lot of guys fret over; you have a dick; it works the way it's supposed to; you're old enough to keep both of us out of prison and, importantly, I'm not going to have to be forced to defend myself. So what if you don't have a huge cock? Doesn't matter to me. I'm not really a "fan" of kissing and cuddling but I've done it just the same so if you wanna warm up with kissing and all that? I'll give it try with you but it's not gonna be a reason for me to tell you no, thanks for asking. That top and bottom thing? I could care less about it; either way works for me and it really does depend on how I feel at the moment... and I've been known to change my mind, too. Rimming? Uh... nope; don't know you that well enough. Fisting? Nope, not even going there. You wanna play alpha male games? I'm not the one... because I'm just as alpha as the next guy and with a very nasty and quick temper and, fuck no: I'm not a girl so don't even think about treating me like one and I might be a lot of things but submissive isn't one of them. Yeah... I got some "rules" and as long as you don't push up against them, we're going to get along fine and make each other cum. Otherwise, sure - we can do something. Just one thing and this is the now 65-year-old talking: If you don't suck dick or don't want your dick sucked, I'm gonna have to tell you thanks... but no thanks because why should you be the only one having this particular kind of fun? If fucking ain't your thing, I'm good with that but, yeah, I could change my mind about it.[/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]My protege said one day, "It couldn't have been that easy!" and I said, "Yeah, it was really that easy, well, at least for me and it was that easy because - and I hate to say it - I went out of my way to make it easy; that's something that, these days, guys aren't so willing to do." He said - and in a joking kind of way, "Wow... you were quite the nasty critter!" And I said, "Yep - sure was and I still am." I explained to him - and not for the first time - that I only have three main criteria: Be of legal age to consent to sex wherever we happen to be; be clean and healthy enough for sex; don't be my idea of an asshole. If you meet these things, we can do it; if you don't meet any of these things, it's not gonna happen and it's not going to be easy for you to convince me otherwise because while I've learned from my own mistakes over the decades, I've really learned from the mistakes others have made and mistake they're now wishing they hadn't made. He's asked me about my "type" of guy and I don't think he really believes me when I say that I don't have one. Race doesn't matter to me nor does any of the other stuff that guys fret over. He'll send me a pic of a guy with a ginormous dick and how he wouldn't even look at it... and I'll say, "Shit, if I did anything, I'd definitely suck it!" He gets... tickled or impressed or something when guys my age and old wants to get him naked in some way and he'll sometimes ask me how I'd feel if some guy older than I am wanted to do something... and I'll tell him that if he can meet my three things, sure -why not? Or some really young buck will be chasing after him and he'll ask, "Would you do him?" Of course I would... as long as he's 18 and able to prove it if I happen to think he's trying to bullshit me; otherwise, why not?[/SIZE][/FONT]
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